Tuesday, 21 June 2011

The evils of a gym membership

So motivated was I by my one hour at the gym that the next day I decided I needed to get the actually membership sorted and decided to sign up for 6 months, while I was enthused and there was an offer on to encourage me. Then I promptly went down with a cold and found myself unable to exercise for nearly a week after. As I said...evil things these gyms.

So what to do having actually paid for the rest of June in membership and a regular DD ready to be taken from my account, I found that having signed up it was 12th July before I decided I really, REALLY needed to make use of that money spent, and besides I needed to collect my membership card.
Zumba class cancelled that evening, (my exercise for that day), so with no other place to be I had no excuses not to go, have to find an excuse somewhere. Can't find one, Oh bummer.

Collect membership card at desk...could go straight home again...but no..., stay for an hour on various bits and pieces then foolishly decide that the needs have to get the better of me, so sign up for a proper programme setting session. A Kickstart....is that a good name for it, we shall see.

3.30pm on a Friday afternoon, is that a good time for torture?

Headed to the gym, checked in then an evil trainer called Josh sat me down and went through some exercise/health questions with me to determine what torture he could devise. I tried to get him to make my weight lighter than it was, but the machine wasn't having any of that, so documented for future reference in its entirety along with the body fat and starting measurements. Hoping no-one ever breaks in and steals it eh? But a starting point to work from and of course can only get better.

"What would you like to achieve?" was the question....well "London marathon coming up so need to get fit for it, might like to start on endurance first and the weight loss will hopefully follow" "OK" says Josh "I think we'll go for some metabolism boosting weight loss stuff first then" hmmmm maybe it is a personal trainer trait thinking they know best what you need (or maybe they just do know best!!!) anyway the list seemed to go on and on and I asked whether it required me to be at the gym from 9am to dusk at which point I was duly informed that this should take around 60-75 minutes. (I guess that's not allowing for breathing or serious lack of motivation or even for avoidance of pain - hang on I am motivated, strike that bit, it is the inevitable pain I wish to avoid)

OK let's go and try some things out.....Oooooh fun time. Rower for warm up then some intervals....Yep can deal with that. Lunges and squats....Oh dear, let's just have a go and see we won't do the full amount of sets....good, then step ups....HOW HIGH??? um...this is going to hurt, we'll work this on one leg then the other, we'll just do the one for now...WHAT I shall be lopsided when I walk out of here and what's with the WE stuff? From here I think Cross trainer....intervals then some static machines (which we talked about but didn't actually do).....then back to the mats for some nice core stuff....Oh boy this is going to hurt lots. And to finish off a bike cool down for 5 mins. Then if I want to I can use the foam rollers to ease out the muscles. Hamstrings, ITB Quads and Calves. Hey what fun. Oh and nothing was mentioned about stretching, but as it is on the card I suspect that will need doing too.

So an hour later, I had talked through my programme, unsuccessfully managed to get him to work on things other than pain and weight loss stuff, with a projected review in 6 weeks time. Thank you very much and good night. Downside now is I only did less than half the programme designed for me and I am shuffling round like my quads and gluts are on fire today. I am seriously going to have to time my gym visits for days when I do not wish to run within 48 hours after.

The gym is just too evil to contemplate.....but.....needs must with the marathon challenge looming large. Hey ho bite the bullet and plan some more torture. I will let you know once it starts to improve (or not as the case may be)

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